Sip of the Iceberg

why did we all just accept those tip screens we should’ve rioted day 1

Flipping burgers for $20/hour is official in California starting next year as Governor Newsom signed higher wages and protections for fast food employees this week. This absolutely kicks ass. Paying people livable wages regardless of their job is not only necessary but we all reap the economic benefits.

Opposition to AB1228 say this will hurt franchise owners (it doesn’t), that restaurants will just pass the costs onto customers (they already have) and force businesses to replace human employees with more automated services like kiosks (they also did that). Also when the fuck did businesses start subsidizing employee wages to the whims of customers with iPads on swivels. The first time we all saw that screen we experienced a universal ‘Oh, um… 15% is fair for a coffee I guess? No, the cashier was friendly and I’m a decent person soo.. definitely 20%. Wait wtf is this screen?!’ We should have rioted immediately. We should probably eliminate tipping entirely but another rant for another day.

Today, unions and workers win. Fuck yeah. 

@kashmeredannyNothing induces a ✨panic✨ faster #millennialsoftiktok #tipping #shoppinghumor

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Speaking of fast food being disappointing, Burger King is being sued for false advertising. The suit claims multiple plaintiffs from across the US were deliberately deceived because their order looks nothing like the product in the advertisement. Burger King asked a judge to dismiss the case, stating all food is stylized for advertising and they’re just trying to make it appear “as appetizing as possible” and should not be held to the standard of serving burgers like the photos in their store windows. 

A judge denied BK’s appeal and has allowed the case to move forward but let’s be real for a minute, both the prosecution and defense have room temperature IQs. Any customer capable of navigating themselves to a Burger King to utter “lemme get a uh….” is well aware their food is gonna look like someone punched it before putting it in the bag. But we don’t care, apathy is what lands everyone in the drive-thru and tbh that burger probably won’t even make it home.

BUUUUUUT then again fuck Burger King and any other company who’s like “Oh that product we’re advertising? We don’t actually sell that. You get a much sadder version of that product.”

most food trucks have more accurate dish representation

The internet had strong opinions about the ice Martha Stewart used in her cocktail- an iceberg. Stewart was promoting a cruise line, which are notoriously terrible for the environment, while sharing that her group used an iceberg for their cocktails. Dozens of commenters pointed out the fjords in Greenland that Stewart collected the ice from are a direct impact of climate collapse.

strong Marie Antoinette vibes

The impact each of us has on the environment is tricky to wrap our heads around as individuals. Like how I can spend a lifetime cautiously recycling my trash but my environmental vigilance is so quickly undone by the Kardashians or Elon Musk or Taylor Swift (choose your out-of-touch-ultra-rich villain they’re all guilty) flying on a private jet ONCE. So what’s the point?

In her defense, I would’ve absolutely sipped an iceberg cocktail, I just wouldn’t have posted about it lol. Stewart’s only sin here is not the ice in her drink but the example she sets. Martha Stewart is an goddamn icon, it just sucks watching someone we all adore do something so blatantly 1%.

@shotbyholloway for our upcoming book ‘Hungry as Hell’

There’s so much more to explore and I’ve exhibited extreme restraint not making this newsletter about my disdain for French cuisine coming fresh off vacation but it’s the weekend and you’ve got the whole damn day ahead of you just waiting to be seized. GET OUT THERE. TOUCH GRASS. FEEL THE WARMTH OF THE FIREBALL IN THE SKY. LIVE GODDAMNIT. We’ll see you back here tomorrow for a Roasted Miso e Pepe Spaghetti Squash you’re gonna love.

Till next time, keep your knives sharp and secure your copy of Hungry as Hell out October 31.